Lord, teach me how to let You love through me fearlessly.  Teach me how to trust You to keep my heart pure and my motives right in every circumstance You allow.  My heart is bleeding, God.  How must Your heart bleed much more.  Here we are, living in America where Christianity has subconciously become a form to many of us.  There are so many faces here, faces that are caught in the swift current of activity and the spoil of instant plenty.  Behind those faces live hearts… so many broken hearts, because of broken lives- broken by sin and the great famine of true love in our land.  Many of those faces have become a facade of happiness… just a facade.  I think of Your Son Jesus, and I know if He would be here, He would be going about touching those hearts with such a profound love that the tears would finally release, and He would bring healing through His eternal love and forgiveness.  Oh, God, how can so much pain and fear and rejection remain buried and uncared for when so many profess Your love with their mouth? 

So please, God, please make us willing vessels of Your love, sanctified and full of Your Spirit and wisdom!  Please make us willing to walk humbly and quietly like Jesus did, and not fear the devil’s darts of suspicion and misunderstanding around us.  Help us to love quietly and deeply, ready at any moment to lay down our life for those You love.  Thank-you so much for Your distinct call to be a friend to sinners.  Thank-you for loving me, a sinner.

In Jesus’ name I offer this prayer…

Looking at that title, I feel a twinge of guilt.  How quickly things can change.  I should admit that yesterday I was just plain grouchy and I didn’t like myself at all.  I don’t know all the whys, but I do know that it was the first day home after a flying trip to PA with just one of my girlies.  The other two were cared for by cousin and aunt at home, so we were all having quite the day blending our lives again yesterday. 

But, after some TLC for all four of us, and some spontaneous tears for all four of us, some nice long naps, and Daddy’s good solid presence in the evening… my heart was once again thankful and dislike for myself just inspired me to gratefulness for Who God is in my life.  And that is why I am out to express joy this morning.

Sometimes I feel like a special needs child in the eyes of God.  I learn slowly and mess up so often, but He never gets impatient with me (unlike me with my girls).  He just loves me and remains what He always is… a strong tower and refuge for my heart to run to and find strength to go on in faith, in spite of circumstances.  He doesn’t deny my sin either, but when my heart is overwhelmed by its fickleness, He stands by with forgiveness in His heart, grace on His lips, and love in His touch.  My heart responds with humble gratitude when I see Him for who He is, and once again, I love Him more deeply than before. 

Thank-you, Lord, from the depths of my heart.  I want to be more like You.