For Where Your Treasure is, There Will Your Heart be Also…
By Leeny | June 5, 2011
Jesus, thank you for the fire. Thank you for Who You are, and that is Life. Thank you that You have humbled Yourself, to become a man, for me. Thank you for walking this earth, among people who did not understand Who You are, so that You could understand who we are. Thank you for immersing Your life and Your heart into the lives and hearts of people… for being an example of what Your children should be. In the face of critics and gainsayers, thank you for walking quietly in the security of Who You belonged to, for showing us where real life is, in Your connection with the Father every day, even in places void of love. Among religious people who inwardly felt so empty, You stepped with the fullness of God, not expecting to be understood… only expecting to understand. Thank you for the tears that You carried in Your heart for them, and for us. Thank you for the tears You wept for them, and for us. Thank you for the healing touch You placed upon many a weary brow, and spoke sweet life into dead bodies and dead hearts. Thank you for walking those 40 days in utter loneliness and temptation, as the devil tormented and tortured you with his lies and wiles, for us… to remind us we are more than conquerors through You. Jesus, thank you for facing rejection and scorn from many hearts, and then total abandonment from those who walked by your side and listened to your words and learned from Your life… and for walking from that place directly into the hands of punishment and death, for a crime You did not commit, for me. The love that You have shown, the pain You have carried, the life You have lived, and died, and then lived anew… has given me life eternal. My heart is so full that I can only worship You through my tears today. I love You because You first loved me. You have proven Your faithfulness to this child through years and years. You have won my heart so completely, so irreversibly. In my heart, when I see You, it is standing in a place of intercession beside the Father, ever watchful of every heart that belongs to You. Embracing Your Presence means entering the place where Love is so pure and so right, where my heart is known through and through, and the security of that place is completely unsurpassable. Knowing You are perfect, and You are God is overwhelming, and knowing You have walked the steps of a man even in Your perfection, and there is nothing, nothing we can face that You do not understand…. *tears*…. thank you, Jesus. YOU. are my Treasure. I love You.
Topics: Family | 5 Comments »
Still on the Planet :)
By Leeny | August 10, 2010
Hey, dear friends,
We are indeed still here, and we never even got to share with you the joy of our newest little bundle, Kyla Faith. She was born Feb. 2, 2010, a PRECIOUS expression to us of our Father’s love. She has brought us pure joy. She is total sweetness and contentment, and we all five have more fun kissing her fat cheeks than you can imagine!! She is now 6 months old and learning to sit, while those first little teeth are taking their good old time pushing through little weary gums. She’s very brave about it.
Kyla’s name was a hard one for us to settle on. PD chose her middle name, Faith, a few months before she was born. It was a perfect expression of what God had been especially teaching us more about. We finally settled on Kyla for the first name, and we now love the combination meanings. ‘Kyla’ means ‘a narrow strait of water, lovely (or beautiful)’. Combined with faith, we love to think of ‘rivers of living water’ that will flow out of us when the Holy Spirit is abundantly within. Our desire is for this little lady to grow up and be a vessel of the power and love of Jesus to everyone around her. Her little life has already been a huge inspiration to us to allow Him to do that work in US first of all. O that her life may be surrounded by the life He puts inside of us, from little up.
We are SO thankful for this new little lady, who puts our number of girls to four!! We are enjoying them all so much. Sometimes I just wish I could stop time a little… so we for sure don’t miss these precious moments with our children.
Topics: Family | 2 Comments »
A Picture
By PD | January 16, 2010
We spent a few days at the beach in Tela, Honduras.
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A Few Pictures of Our Posies!
By PD | May 18, 2009
…and there is an old one of their Mom and Dad… mmm, I love that guy!
Topics: Family | 2 Comments »
"Who is Christ Within You?"
By Leeny | May 18, 2009
photo credits: David Peight
That was the title of the message we heard yesterday. I listened, saturated with joy… unable to remain silent the whole way through. In fact, the joy was so powerful, I suddenly became aware of clenched fists in my lap. :)
Why have I lived so much of my life knowing this was true, that He could be alive and real within, but having no idea just HOW real, how deep and lasting the joy and life could be…?
Looking around, the desire springing up in our hearts was obvious. And suddenly, I realized, knowing that Jesus can be flowing like a fountain through our hearts, literally pouring out of our bellies as rivers of living water is one thing… and HAVING Him be just that… is as close to us as one little moment of faith.
God will cleanse our hearts of the blocks of fear, condemnation, confusion, religion, and discouragement, in a moment, if we ask. He promised. And when they are gone, we can reach out, and grasp something REAL. We can touch Him… be filled with Him… love Him like never before.
And then, Christ within becomes EVERYTHING. And our life is no longer our own. We become the most joyful possession we have ever been.
Topics: Musings | No Comments »
A Quick Update
By PD | March 4, 2009
I know it’s been way too long since we have updated anything on here, but life has been moving right along for us. We are grateful to God for His unchanging and steadfast love through anything life brings us. Last Friday Leeny was diagnosed with viral meningitis, and she has been pretty much flat on her back since then. We ended up in the ER yesterday for a while and did some more extensive testing, and thankfully nothing else showed up. The extreme pain in her head is lessening, thank God, and she is backing off her pain pills slowly. Today it feels like she is finally over the hump, and headed back to normal. Thanks to all who were praying for us, that was a great encouragement to me. It was definitely a strange way to celebrate our ninth anniversary.
God is good.
All the time.
Topics: Family | 5 Comments »
A week with Beth… oh wow.
By Leeny | January 3, 2009
We are a little behind the times here, but just had to put in a little post about the week when our dear friend Beth came down. We met Beth and her parents during our trip to Honduras last March. Between my fresh grief over Isaac’s death and the grief in Beth’s heart over leaving her little sisters and her brothers behind as she and her parents headed for the states, we connected. We have since developed a very precious friendship. Thanks, lil sis. :) Beth’s life inspires me continually, because I see her drawing comfort and grace from a Strength much greater than her own. I am so blessed by her ability to thank God for her pain because she knows He loves her and will somehow make beauty from the ashes in her life. Her presence in our home brought much cheer and delight. The week went way too fast, but we enjoyed it immensely, and Beth left us with lots of sweet memories… and PHOTOS! We haven’t had a camera, so I’m posting some of Beth’s pictures for your enjoyment. All credits to her! I love you, Beth.
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Topics: Family | 6 Comments »
“Without Me, Ye Can Do Nothing”
By Leeny | November 23, 2008
Tonight I was lying in bed after PD and I prayed and he had fallen asleep. I desperately needed to talk to God. I haven’t been spending the time talking to Him that is so vital to maintain the life inside. As I lay there talking to Him, and felt His love and His grace and His life welling up like a fountain inside, I was overwhelmed by Him. It still baffles me how He can live inside of us so intensely… so incredibly real. How can He be there, where all my humanity and sinful tendencies lie?? But He is. His forgiveness is so secure. His grace is like an ocean. His love is unfathomable and unquenchable. His conviction is sweet. His LIFE is unending. He is real. He is there. He is not some distant figure who frowns upon us as He waits for us to attain a great measure of holiness before we can feel His Presence. His Presence reaches us when we admit our sinfulness and are honest about how much we need Him. His forgiveness removes our sin far from us and His love overwhelms our weak and faltering hearts. His grace pours over our insecurities and drowns them in the security of Himself. His LIFE resurrects through the death of ourselves… oh, ouch. Perhaps so many of us stop at the forgiveness and receive only little bits of His grace into our hearts at times because we are afraid to feel the pain of death. How often have I done it myself?? How often have I turned my face away from the Spirit of God because my heart was overwhelmed by fears. Oh, Lord, please forgive me for grieving your Spirit at times… for exchanging your LIFE for my fears. I would rather hang on to them because they are so familiar and limiting? But oh, to discover the fountain of joy that erupts when the pain and the death is accomplished within me! Like the little seed who at last lay cracked and splintered to reveal his worthlessness inside, still contracting from the last throes of pain as he surrendered to his fate… Suddenly, from above, the LIGHT shown through into his very heart and with that light came LIFE, beautiful, vibrant life erupting forth, engulfed by the warmth of the Son and straining toward Him with everything he has been given. Thank-you, Jesus!!!
Last night, we visited PD’s parents, and I was searching through the bookshelves for a good book for my daughter to read. I stood there gazing at the wealth of good reading material… so many good books. ‘Faith’. ‘The Gift of Intercession’. ‘Complete in Christ’. ‘A Set Apart Life’. ‘The Purpose Driven Life’. ‘The Grace of God’. ‘The Bondage Breaker’.
Those are not all actual titles, but I am quite certain there was a book for each of those subjects, besides many more. I thought about our little joke about writing books, and how I actually would love to write one sometime if God gives the inspiration and the time. But I realized… another book to stash on our bookshelves would be nice… but even if people read it, and perhaps are even blessed and touched by God because of it, will it really make a difference?? That got me thinking further. What will make the MOST difference? God will. So God can and does use books. But what is the most powerful tool in the hands of God and His people? Perhaps prayer? But even that, will it make a difference unless HE is in it and it is full of HIM and HIS life moving in our hearts towards Himself? So it must absolutely be the work of God for any of these good things to be genuine fruit of His Spirit and Presence in our lives. And what will move Him toward us but prayer… groanings of honesty from our own hearts reaching towards Him in faith? What will move His heart towards His faltering children to strengthen their faith but the prayers of their brothers and sisters?? Is there really time to pour my life into anything else, or to have anything else poured into my life, but prayer??
Tonight… as I lay upon my bed and I thought of all the questions that I have heard coming out of the honest hearts of myself, my husband, my children, and my friends, those questions and groanings gave way to a picture in my mind of a group of hungry children, our arms outstretched and grasping heavenward, our eyes gleaming with tears and incredible hunger… we are reaching for life. We are reaching for Him. Some of us lose our way in the search. We become discouraged by our circumstances, not realizing that the things that make us feel our inadequacies so keenly have been allowed by God in His mercy because He knows they provide the best opportunities for us to find Him. Sometimes we are discouraged by others who have quit their search, or become satisfied in the good things they have found. Some of us turn away from the light to find the answers within ourselves. We raid the resources and intellect God has given us, finding plenty of good theories and raising good questions, trying to analyze them and reach a logical conclusion. Yet we remain unsatisfied, for our conclusions are human, though the very best of humanity there is to be found. It is not enough. Others of us look within ourselves for the beauty we yearn for and we find some… but it doesn’t satisfy and we end up enjoying ourselves and disliking Christianity, but we are still hungry.
While my mind ponders these pictures, my heart is pulsing with Love, Life, and a Joy that cannot be explained. And I wonder… how can what we are searching so earnestly for be so simple, so available to us, yet be so hard to find? I think of how Jesus came, swaddled in humility from the day of His birth. I think of how He walked among men and women, quietly, no big ado, just love… forgiveness… healing… a tenderness beyond what any of us realize. I think of how He was so often silent, but He was God. I think of how He faced the eager religious leaders with sobriety, how He understood their human tendency to see only what was on the outside, and not the heart. Yet He could not condone this, for He looked on the hearts of men. I think of how Jesus received the blessings and worship from sinners, and forgave them. I think of how He ate with the publicans and the harlots, loving them, but never touched by their sin. I think of how He healed the sick, cast out demons… how He expounded the kingdom of God to His disciples in parables, so they could understand. And then, what suffering He endured, cruel accusations, and revilings He was unworthy of. He took it silently, for us, because He loved us. He died. He resurrected!!
That Jesus Christ has made it possible for Himself to dwell within us, to change us into His image, by the Spirit of God. It is Him that we are reaching for! We are yearning for Him. We are seeking Him. He is the LIFE, the LOVE, the FORGIVENESS we all long for. But our hunger for Him will only be satisfied when we choose the path that leads to Him… We need willingness to be buried with baptism in His death and resurrected through His Spirit to LIFE in Christ Jesus. We need willingness to walk in that life, which invariably means death to ourselves. We must accept His will… to be vulnerable and honest before God and man, to not shun the rejection nor fear the misunderstandings of those around us, yes, sometimes those we love the most. We simply must be willing to be like Him, to live like He did.
It sounds so hard. It sounds so… painful to my heart. But as I feel that deep joy welling up and spilling over the agony of death, my heart says AMEN.
“Even so, come, Lord Jesus.”
Topics: Family | 7 Comments »