As the days pass by, I am constantly in amazement of God.  There are so many little things that have happened and continue to happen, that prove to us God’s sovereignty in this experience.  He has ways of comforting us in our grief that can only be His ways. 

Yesterday morning, the phone rang, and when I answered it, I heard the beautiful sound of new lungs serenading the arrival of life, and the voice of a Daddy that was too happy to even be tired.   I knew … it was our dear friends, Daniel and Rosalyn.  They called to annouce the arrival of their darling baby boy, Brian Eric.  This call brought another kind of tears, tears of joy that have deeper meaning than those shed at other births.  Brian’s big sister, Janelle Dawn, is celebrating the streets of gold with Isaac today.  She left this world in December of 2006 at just three months of age.  

 I was in awe of God.  Daniel and Rosalyn, who well know the path of tears and pain that death of a loved one brings, as well as God’s overwhelming grace during such a time … they are privileged to be an instrument of joy and comfort right now.  That is just the way God is.  Thank-you, Lord.

Below is a picture of my little girl’s reaction to the news that Rosalyn’s baby had finally arrived.  She loves the Bylers dearly, and has been very anxious to see this little one that she knew was growing inside his mama.  Her expression mirrors my heart.

                                                               

                                                                 

Many of you have been wondering if or when there will be any sort of memorial service here in NC for Isaac.  This is just to inform you that there will be one here, Lord willing, but not till the Coates return from Honduras.  All we know right now is that it is planned for the first weekend in April.  The final dates have not been announced yet. 

More later …

It’s Sunday morning in NC.  The loss of little brother weighs this morning.  Isaac’s friends and loved ones all have different ways of grieving, of handling the staggering loss.  For me, thoughts of his gain have given so much comfort every day even in the midst of pain. This morning I woke up, though, and the realities hit me with much sadness.  Church was always a special time to see his face and exchange a few words, give a hug, invite him home for lunch when his family was gone.  While we know that he would have still been in Honduras, today we will know that he is not ever coming through those doors again.  Maybe his family is thinking those things this morning.  Pray for them.

Here, the grieving continues with so little to bring closure of any sort at this point.  A number of Isaac’s closest friends are sweetly gathered with his family in Erandique today.  But another great number are gathering here today to try to have a church service. Moderators, song leaders, and preachers feel a certain burden today that is different than usual.  May we request special prayer, that God will be glorified and that He will show us how to comfort each other?

Thanks so much to the hundreds of you that have prayed and supported Isaac’s mother and sisters and family this week.  It means so much to them.   Hearing a few voices from Honduras yesterday was so encouraging.  They are experiencing what we are, God’s grace and comfort in the midst of tragedy that is only ours on earth, for now.

The second group who traveled down experienced some delays with a missed flight.   They may still be making their way toward Erandique this morning.  Among them are three of Isaac’s best friends and also one of his mother’s closest friends.  A memorial service will be going on down there today, too.  Do carry them on your heart.

And one more thing … one of Isaac’s best friends is in Mexico today, without others who loved Isaac surrounding her. The past few days have been really difficult for her. Please pray for Isaac’s ‘big sis’, Linda. 

How can one person have so many best friends?  I tried to think if I am using that term incorrectly somewhere, but every one of those I mentioned are really his best friends, and I have only included some of them.

Thank-you to all who have been praying for Isaac’s family and friends.  Your concern and care means so much in a time of unspeakable grief. 

I would like to give you a few names to especially bring to God today.  I understand there were 6 other young men with Isaac at the time of his accident.  While we know God’s grace has been with them, this tragedy has gone deep into their hearts.  Would you please pray for them especially today, as the searching and burial is now past, and they are left with a lot of difficult memories to deal with.  I talked to one of them just after Isaac disappeared, and I felt the terror and helplessness in their hearts.  This is very real.

Daniel Troyer (Isaac’s brother-in-law and friend), Micah (one of Isaac’s best friends), Philip (Daniel and Micah’s little brother),  Michael Brubaker (another very dear friend who really loved Isaac), David Walker and Caleb Kanagy, whom I don’t know well, but were there, too, and I’m sure were touched by his life as every person who knew him was.  I hope I didn’t miss anyone.  If you would carry these dear ones on your heart to God today, you will be doing a great service to Isaac’s mother and family as well as the families of these young men. 

Thanks so much and God bless you.  Also pray for the ones who traveled down in the last two days (some are still enroute) to be with the family.  Among them are friends who were very close to Isaac’s heart.  They will need mega doses of God’s grace in the next few days especially.  I believe God will use each one of them to be a minister of comfort and grace to the Coates family.

These logistics are hard for me to write about, but I know that many of you want to be praying for Isaac’s family and friends in Honduras today, so I will do my best.

God definitely answered prayers on behalf of finding his body last night.  Though they found him 2 miles downriver, the speed of the water could have taken it there very quickly.  Those searching almost decided not to go out and look because it seemed so futile.  Thank God for guiding them so clearly!  They found his body at 9:15pm (11:15 here) and immediately took it to San Antonio, where they prepared it for burial.  They left immediately for Erandique, where Isaac’s family was waiting.  They arrived there this morning.  The burial will be today on the clinic grounds, in the area where Jr Troyers, the Clutters,  and Daniel and Melissa are living.  There will be a service there on Sunday, after the group of about 9 from the Coates’ home church here in NC arrives.   So please keep them in your hearts and prayers.   God bless you.

Reality sinks in deeper with the tangible evidence of our loss now recovered.  My heart is overwhelmed with memories this morning.  The thought of never seeing Isaac again on earth is just too much for words …

It’s so hard to believe that the familiar ways of one person we love won’t be here for us to see anymore.  His personal little quirks, the words and expressions typical of only him, his leather jacket that bore the scratches of his accident in November (they were always a reminder of how fortunate we all were to still have him around), the sound of his bike going by, or better yet, idling in the lane,  seeing him don his helmet and popping his visor open for one last word, the sight of his phone in his hand, hearing his voice, but more than that, seeing his face … all these and more are irreplaceable characteristics of Isaac that I miss.  The loss is much greater for his family today, and his life-long friends.

Thank-you, dear Isaac, for gracing the world with your beauty. I can see your queried look, “Beauty?”  Compliments were hard for you to take, I know, but you would understand what I mean.  You always understood the deep implications that most people don’t begin to grasp.  And today, your comprehension of beauty is so far above and beyond what any of us know on earth.  I wish you could somehow tell us about it.  I can’t wait to walk those streets of gold with you and hear your descriptions and all your first impressions.   I’m so glad you don’t have to say “I’ll try” anymore when we tell you to take care of yourself.  Rest in your forever day in Heaven, dear friend. 

Your mourning sis –

Could it be that angels live

Among us here for years?

Could it be they come in form

Of hard-trod paths, kin to tears?

If so, then maybe I can understand,

If so, perhaps my heart can bear

The pain, the love, the joy all intertwined.

Could it be that angels come

With hesitance at birth?

Then dash to meet the world,

With ardor and vim of no dearth?

If so, then maybe I can understand,

If so, perhaps my heart can bear

The pain, the love, the joy all intertwined.

Could it be that angels love

Each heart to the kernel?

Could it be their friendship leaves

A touch as of God eternal?

If so, then maybe I can understand,

If so, perhaps my heart can bear

The pain, the love, the joy all intertwined.

Could it be that angels cry

When people are so cruel?

When men of depth are rare

And tender hearts are fool?

If so, then maybe I can understand,

If so, perhaps my heart can bear

The pain, the love, the joy all intertwined.

Could it be that angels die,

Their hearts too great for earth?

Could it be tears of our loss

Outweigh the pain at birth?

If so, then maybe I can understand,

If so, perhaps my heart can bear

The pain, the love, the joy all intertwined.

The light in your eyes, the deep sobriety in your eyes, the unusual compassion, the zest for life, the struggle with life, your capacity to love, the way you understood hearts, the impression you left on every one that knew you … were you just sent from God, and had to go to Him again? Thank-you, friend. We miss you.  We always will. Welcome Home.

I wonder how many times in the last six months I have told you that.  Now you are with Jesus and nobody will ever have to tell you again, because you are experiencing it completely! 

With tears in my heart, I want to dedicate this post to our beloved friend, Isaac Coates.   This young man has left an influence on so many lives like few people ever could.  He is a brother to Melissa, my heroine below, and her husband Daniel.  They were extremely close, so please pray for her and Isaac’s whole family, his mother Joy, and other sisters Shanna, Brianna, Gretta, and Amy.  Their Daddy welcomed Isaac into heaven today, as far as we can know.  For more information on the accident, please check out our friends’ blog at www.xanga.com/innerjoy 

There are few words for the pain in my heart … when it’s someone so close to you, sometimes the details are hard to talk about in the midst of the numb shock.  Those of us who love Isaac (and we are many) feel so far away and helpless to do anything but pray for his friends and loved ones there, and weep together here. Shortly after Isaac disappeared, I got a call on my phone from our mutual friend Michael, who was swimming with him.  Since that time, amidst many tears and cries to God, I have been thinking deeply.    I would like to share a tribute to Isaac tonight. 

Isaac impacted my own life in a way almost no one has, and in a few months time, he became as close as the closest brother to me.  Even then, I have known few people with the depth and insight and sensitivity and compassion that Isaac has.  The last year of his life has been tough, with lots of questions and searchings for him.  For some reason, in the midst of the heat of the spiritual battle he was in, he priviledged me deeply by dropping by several times for a cup of coffee and to share his heart.  In a very short time, I felt like I had known him forever, and I loved him deeply.  We kept in touch from then until two weeks ago when he left to spend a few weeks in Central America with his family.  I’ve missed him incredibly, but we were all looking forward to seeing him again in two weeks when our family plans to go down.  I didn’t know I would have to wait till Heaven.

 I cannot explain how, but God used Isaac to stir my heart toward God in one of the deepest revivals I have ever experienced in my life.  It is so deep, in fact, that it has been hard to talk about.  God drew my heart to His in love and in compassion for souls like never before.  He stirred me to realize His calling upon my own life in a very profound way.  He put a burden on my heart to pray for this dear son of His, as I somehow always knew he was … and that burden stayed there every day for the last five or six months.  God loved that man, and He wanted Him by His side, I am convinced.  Many nights, God would not let me sleep because the compelling love and burden to pray was so real, and He taught me more about what true intercession really was through Isaac.   The love that God poured into my heart for his soul was so that I didn’t know what do with it sometimes … that is the way God is.

I saw in Isaac a gift that is rare to the world.  It is hard to explain here, but it seemed the magnitude of his potential for God was beyond most human beings’.  The devil knows these special people, and he is a master at trying to destroy them.  But I thank God that he is defeated.  Perhaps that is the best gift Isaac has given me.  That is the continual opportunity to exercise faith in a God Who is so much bigger than most of us ever allow Him to be, in our lives, and in everyone else’s life.  And I rejoice to know that my dear brother friend indeed turned his heart toward God and once again found peace in that relationship.  In one of our last conversations, he told me that he hadn’t been so happy in a long while as he was right then.  My last memory of him is a warm good-bye hug and the peace I saw in his eyes the night he left the states to be with his family.  Thank-you, Jesus.

This afternoon, for awhile my thoughts were frantic towards God, “You have to show yourself strong once more and save his life!!”  But gradually, God touched my heart with His peace, and through my tears and groanings for Isaac’s dear family and all of us who love him so much, there came a growing realization of God.  Once again, He is bigger than us all.  We thought God needed Isaac here to make a difference in His kingdom.  But God loved Isaac.  He wants to give him rest and shower him with the Father love that Isaac so longed for.  He wants to wipe away all his tears and answer all his questions and hold Him near.   He did use him countless times, even in the darkest hours of his life here.  I didn’t think that was fair, that others were changed so positively by his life when his own difficulties were huge to him, but he cared so much about people.   I can still see him tilt his head in that caring manner and hear his sincere parting words uttered so often, “Take care …”  

 God did it then and is even now using him to make a difference.  But for Isaac himself, there is rest.  Just rest, and a new body with all ten fingers intact, and joys indescribable forever.    That is how God is.                                        

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         

                                                               

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          It 

It would be selfish to wish him back.  Tho’ the tears flow freely as we miss everything about him so much, God gives grace to say, ‘Thy will be done.’

Lord, please comfort his dear family.   Please comfort us all … he had so many, many friends.